Expecting the unexpected….

I spent the larger portion on my early 30s desperate for a baby. In that quiet keening kinda way that disturbs small dogs and makes potential partners edge nervously for the door.  I even had a brief moment when I couldn’t imagine life having any meaning without the patter of tiny footsies.  And then I had to pull myself towards myself and come to terms with two clear facts: there was a good possibility that I was never going to have kids or if I did, I was going to be facing a non-traditional option.  

I weighed up the idea of various non-traditional approaches and eventually realised that doing things entirely on my own was probably not a road I wanted to go down.  So made some significant moves to investigating egg freezing. 

Not having kids took longer to get my head around than I thought it would.  But I did.  And the prospect was actually quite rad, to quote my 16 year old cousin.  International travel, less panic about stable income, sloth…yeah, I could do that. 

So imagine my surprise…

.

The universe laughs and laughs and laughs and laughs. 

If I dig deep for honesty here, I’m a little ambivalent.  I’d made other plans.  I’d shifted my perception of myself really rather drastically.  Mother was not fundamental to my sense of future self any more.  On the other hand, whoah!  Baby!  Squee!  A wee beastie in mah belleh.  A little zygote of pure loveliness.  Extraordinarily awesome. 

Fuck me.  Life does like it’s curve balls, don’t it?

Unexpected

Cheers! (eye contact! eye contact!)

Aaah.  So when I told people I’d be travelling half way across the world to meet two women from the interwebs on the isle of Lesbos in Greece, I got some pretty strange responses.

At best, people politely asked me if that was wise.  At worst they hooted with laughter and asked me if I was mental.  The short answer is yes.  I am both wise* and mental.  And I also believe that even if you are a consummate psychopath, blogging for 3 years will reveal many parts of yourself, and the parts I’d seen of Nurse Myra and DaisyFae, I liked.  Even the raw, sad, mad and bad bits. In fact, some of those bits I liked the best.  Because they mirrored my sad, mad and bad bits.

So I booked.  And found myself on the other side of the world having adventures with the most amazing woman.  Strong, beautiful, generous, kind, caring women.  Wicked, delicious, crazy, fabulous women.  Women who are now not just my blogging buddies, but now also my friends.

We talked a lot.  But we also spent time in a comfortable silence.  And there was no tension or cattiness or awkwardness.  Which, to be honest, surprised me.  Chicks in close quarters can be scary.  But not us.  I think part of that was the kind of instant ‘I know you’ feeling we all had, one part from having read each other’s innermost thoughts for 3 years, and one part because of that ‘wise’ bit, gut instinct, recognition – we kinda just knew it was going to be good.  Better than good.  Fab!  And we came with no expectations and no judgement.

So in the spirit of the last two weeks, here are 10 unexpected things, happenings and discoveries, some of which made me laugh, some which made my eyes pop out of my head, all of which made me love these women.  9 are true.  1 is not.  Guess the right combo, and I’ll send you a present**.

1. one of us crawled into bed with Daisy within the first couple of days
2. one of us snores like a tractor
3. one of us can make scary-good animal noises
4. one of us one of kissed a Lesbos girl…and she liked it
5. one of us pranced around the beach buck naked every day
6. one of us was a lightweight, and was in bed by 9.30 almost every night
7. one of us used hand gestures to illustrate the mechanics of female ejaculation in the shadow of the Parthenon, in front of the tourists
8. one of us is a goat whisperer
9. one of us is a ‘greek’ virgin
10. one of us gets giggly-pissed on 2 drinks

Dais, Myra; thank you.  What an absolutely cracking holiday.  I can’t wait to do it again.

Now pass me the zucchini flowers, and let’s talk about peni.

*there are two things ye should know about Dolce…

**terms and conditions apply.  Like the present might not actually be real.  And stuff.